it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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