marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
