I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I think my moral compass just broke
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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