i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Randomize
