Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
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aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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