I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
