i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize