I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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