the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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