Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
