do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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