May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
