it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
This baby is an asshole
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
did you just send me my own nude
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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