She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
