Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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