just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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