Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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