this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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