I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
