Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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