Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
