Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
