You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
