U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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