you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Two words: nipple clamps
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