I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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