I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
