Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
