He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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