Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you win again, gameday.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize