My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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