mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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