Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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