Me too!
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i will never coherently bang her
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
