i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
we should paint friendship bongs
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
