it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
