Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
