Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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