i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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