apparently the secret to your success is patron
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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