her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You ruined the universe
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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