I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
