Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Randomize