there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
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Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize