I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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