Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
