i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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