Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
