I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
