ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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