I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
