even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
