We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize